Red Shoes

Today I am wearing my red Birkenstock sandals. They are prettier than the ones above and I feel good when I look down on them. I have always been pleased with my feet. In Japan I understand that the feet and the neck are focal points of admiration in women. I think I would have been a hit in Japan.
I am also wearing a red shirt. It is my 'poet shirt' that I got when I joined The Academy of American Poets. And I have added red lipstick. I find that red lipstick does not last very well on me but I renew it from time to time. The color red is cheery.
I feel stronger today. I was up by 8:30 and had a breakfast of hot oatmeal with raisins and walnuts and warm soy milk. And I had a cup of peppermint tea. It all tasted pretty good.
Did my usual perusal of aol news and Facebook. Getting some early birthday greetings. My actual b.d. is next Sunday. I don't want any fuss this year and will be celebrating quietly. I also read the NY Times extensively this morning. Focused of course on the latest in the debt ceiling crisis. Hopeful. And I read an interesting article about a liberal Catholic protest group in Chicago. I also read Modern Love. It is a feature of the Sunday Times that I have encouraged Marth to write for. She writes as well as all of the contributors I have read.
Did my spiritual reading in one of Adya's books and meditated for a while. Then spent a couple of hours resting and reading Game of Thrones.
I read an e-mail from Amy - a response to one I had written to her. I sent an e-mail catching my friend Sharon up on my health. And I wrote to Jen.
I fixed a salad and some raisin bread that Danny had bought me for lunch. The salad had no taste but the bread tasted good. Am halfway through with my fluid requirements for the day.
I was very tired last night so did not watch any TV but went to bed early and read. Asleep by 10.
I am so pleased that the NFL lockout is over. I have been a fan of pro football for the past few years and look forward to seeing what the Cards can do this season. Am also a Sun Devil football fan and am happy to see them back on track being picked no 2 in the southern division of the new Pac 12.
And golf being my favorite is something I watch a lot.
Would spend some time outside if it were not so hot. Except for early morning when I am not up and early evening it is too draining to be out in the heat. The gardens are not at their best. Neither Phil nor I were up to doing the usual summer planting. But some of the perennials are still colorful. And of course the fabulous wisteria, beautifully draped over the waterfall arbor has been giving me lovely long bunches of lavendar bloom for nearly two months. Cheerful as the red shoes!
Made a simple dinner last night. A grilled piece of tilapia with lemon and some steamed brussel sprouts with lemon butter. And it all tasted like itself. Marvelous! But later I made some popcorn and it was a disaster. The metal taste had appeared and I could not eat any of the popcorn.
Win some lose some.
I think I will let the red shoes take me out to pick up the Sunday paper. See you anon.

Balancing Act

Of late my life has turned into a balancing act. The picture above is a pretty good approximation of how foggy and ephemeral it often feels.
I am at present recovering from three hospitalizations dating from this past March when I was suddenly felled after a social evening out with dehydration and wound up being admitted to the hospital. Since then another visit to the ER in April with more dehydration. And then around three thirty in the morning of the Fourth of July I went by ambulance with serious breathing problems back to the hospital then to be diagnosed with over hydration. Thus the beginning of the balancing act.
My diagnosis is congestive heart failure. Both my heart and my kidneys are not functioning at full efficiency. They are a team and one of their jobs is to manage hydration.
The doctors job has been to diagnose and prescribe medication. I will not recover from congestive heart failure. It can be stabilized and I can live a long time with it but it is a progressive condition and the only movement is down.
My part is to watch my fluid intake. It is to be kept up to but not over 64 ozs. per day. I record all of the fluid that I take in as the day goes by. I also must weigh myself every morning. Should my weight go below 135 (  it is presently 137.6) I must stop the Lasix ( a powerful diuretic). Should my weight go above 145 I must double the dose.
I also need to record my blood pressure every day. I do it before and after meds and I record my pulse. This information is helpful to the doctors to ascertain my progress and response to meds.
I need to eat healthfully and my vegan/vegetarian diet is particularly good for my heart and kidneys. Unfortunately one of the side effects of poor kidney function is a loss of taste. No matter what I prepare there is not much taste to my food. I discipline myself to eat it because I need it. Happily the chocolate chips in a health food (sugar free) cookie that I eat do taste like chocolate!!
I have yet another balancing act to manage. I have sciatica pain issues in my butt that allow me to sit for limited periods of time. I have to sit as long as I can and then recline. I have very painful arthritis in the back of my neck and reclining exacerbates the pain so I can only recline so long. I have issues with pain in the muscles of my hips and thighs and can only walk 200 steps before needing to rest. And I have a left knee that needs replacement so must not do too much walking. So it is a big balancing act between standing, sitting and reclining. I tried the heavy pain medication but I prefer to put up with a lot of pain to the side effects of the meds.
I am hoping to get strong enough to be able to balance going out in the world which I love to being home and quiet which I also love.
For a while I will blog about how I am staying in balance.
Today's food so far:
Hot oatmeal with raisins and soy milk for breakfast and some decaffeinated lemon tea.
A double fiber bread sandwich of tomatoe, avocado, lettuce, bacon bits and Miracle Whip plus my health cookie for lunch and a glass of orange juice.
Lots of rest this morning as I was very weak.
Dressed today in bright pink for cheer.
Did some spiritual reading, watched Deadliest Catch, ran the dishwasher.
Let Christy and Gene in so they could put her clothes in my closet. She is staying from tomorrow until next Sunday while her floors are being refinished.
Enjoying my clean house. Marth worked 7 hours this week and I can feel her thoroughness in my sparkling house. And her kindness has been a comfort to me.
Hope to get the dishwasher emptied before the day is over and fix a nutritious dinner.
Will perhaps watch a little TV and then to bed to read Game of Thrones.
Grateful for another day on the planet.